“Dragging my canoe behind me”
My old man was a smart ass. He was one of those WWII guys who actually had to shoot and choke some Deutchlanders.
When anybody began any type of self promotion in his presence he would occasionally interject in between th “I’s and the “and then I’s” >“Dragging my canoe behind me.”< It was an inside joke between himself and his long departed comrades chuckling somewhere in Faf de Fulet France, from back in the day, when something really serious was going on. So feel free to interject at any time during my hypedrome >“Dragging my canoe behind me.”<
I graduated from Jesuit High School Suma Soma Time’ I exerted myself some times.
I began college
I began making surfboards
I built Natural Art Surfboards at one time to one of the largest surfboard companies in this galactic quadrant.
Somebody invented the Commodore Computer (?) it’s like the first time you have sex (what? goes where?)
Steve Jobs and Woz invented the Apple Computer (for me)
The ad agencies we were using sucked
I began designing Natural Art’s ads (Photoshop and Freehand were invented for me as well)
I started doing ads for others (“me afraid of computer“) later Windows boxes were invented for them
I read about the web (Berners-Lee invented it for me)
I made Natural Art a web site
I told everyone about this new medium, tap tap tap (time going by while people figure it out) people had me start making their web sites (fun fun fun)
Steve Jobs had some programmers invent QuickTime for me (thanks Steve) linear video editing!
Satan slipped inside Adobe. He and minions created Adobe Premier (feh)
Adobe showed everybody (chuckle snort) they (and satan) went exclusively to Windows (guffaw)
Steve had the guys bang out Final Cut Pro (for me) the clouds parted a ray of sunlight showered me with sprinkles of love.
Along the way, Oh did I tell you I used to be in a band? I spent a fortune on some cuh-rappy very expensive audio editing programs. Gah!
Steve heard my pleas and had the pasty white elves in the bowels of Apple bang out Garageband and SoundTrack
I produced and edited numerous videos
I am currently working on a series of bizarre western tunes for Bud Gardners Ghost Town video coming out soon.
I am currently studying the art of social networking design and layout
Web Video will soon reach levels of nirvanic proportions (see blog)
There is probably a great deal I am leaving out but this canoe keeps slipping from my grip.